Pole to Pole

Day 23: Helsinki

Well, they certainly know none of us is Madonna. Lasse waxes lyrical as Nigel tries to frame shots which will be acceptable to BBC Television.

'It's meditative, contemplative, reflective . . . not a place for angst or anxiety or argument . . . that's why you have settled
so many disputes in the sauna in Finland - political ones, economic ones . . . whatever. Because who wants to argue when they are naked, you know . . . '

'What are those twigs for?' I ask, meditatively.

'They're birch twigs. They must be picked about midsummer when the leaves are soft . . . '

Lasse picks up the bundle and proceeds to whack himself about the face and upper body, before offering it to me.

I begin to apply them gently. Neil looks unimpressed.

'No, you've got to get the circulation going . . . '

He grabs the twigs and lays into me. Lasse looks on with approval.

'Try it on the face, very nice on the face . . . you get a nice sort of scent from it . . . '

The flagellation does produce a pleasantly aromatic tingling sensation and I feel it's only polite to offer to scourge someone else. Lasse accepts and I go to work.

'Say when . . . '

This all seems very energetic and I'm still waiting for the contemplative and reflective bit when Neil suggests we go and jump in the lake.

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PALIN'S GUIDES

Series: Pole to Pole
Day: 23
Country/sea: Finland
Place: Helsinki
Book page no: 48

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