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  The Chatter Box : Blathering On
Messages 1 2 

if microsoft made cars by irishmanufan on 28 May 2003 3:13pm
this is another one non-racist this time :0)

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with
the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have
to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the
car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some
reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car
to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall
the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five
times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of
the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the
key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same
manner as the old car.

10.You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Re: if microsoft made cars by Sophie-Louise on 28 May 2003 9:09pm
thanks linda, that is very funny and so true! i'm printing it off!

Sophie-Lou :)
Re: if microsoft made cars by macauley on 29 May 2003 1:15am
..yes, a funny one and i printed it too! lends some thought to a series of "if microsoft made": DVD players, Video tape machines and microwave ovens. at least they already have their names on the ovens...
Re: if microsoft made cars by Mac on 29 May 2003 1:37pm
Hey Linda thats very witty...my poor brain box is that overloaded there is no room for it to manufacture funny stuff...wonder if bill gates could help ???

MAC xxx
Re: if microsoft made cars by Rusted on 30 May 2003 5:51am

Thanks for the humour...I needed it...

Re: if microsoft made cars by cloakndagger on 30 May 2003 8:55pm
That's why I purchased a Powerbook three years ago when an evil little virus destroyed my PC. It was that last straw in years
of the "blue screen of death."

I've never looked back. Well, okay, I do glance back and giggle as my pc friends struggle to load things.


Re: if microsoft made cars by peripatetically on 30 May 2003 9:04pm
pleae delete WEbbie
Re: if microsoft made cars by peripatetically on 30 May 2003 9:05pm
I'm with you, Tammie. I bought an iMac from the start. I read that Michael has one now too!!! Good taste and good sense!!!

Re: if microsoft made cars by Helen on 31 May 2003 3:42pm
If Macs were cars, they would come equipped with tow cables so they could haul away all those crashed PC's.
And they would be available in pretty colors.
Re: if microsoft made cars by cloakndagger on 1 June 2003 3:15pm
Macs are the favored tools of the highly creative! My PC friends say I'm a fanatic just because I found out an Apple store was opening in Atlanta and I stood outside with my nose pressed against the glass for a week.

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